I watched Grey's Anatomy S11, E 21 yesterday. Meredith had to let Derek go. She studied his chart, she has to let him go. He will not survive the damages of the post-op. It was because the neuro-surgeon was at a dinner and was late by 1 hour 30mins to save him.
It was the most heart breaking moment when the person you really love, have been love all this while, and you have to call it. You have to let them go.
In my dream last night, I lost Chris, in a split moment, like Meredith, have to let him go. Told you, it freaked me out.
I could not remember what exactly happen, but it happened. And I felt helpless in that dream.
I have been postponing to discuss about engagement, wedding and so fort because I want Chris to be ready, both of us. But the truth is, am I ready for both of us?
When I recall again the dream, I was terrified again. Life is too short that I could lose everything that I have this moment. Just like that. One moment you are breathing. Another second, you might be having a heart attack. And within that split seconds, you recall the life you had. That near death moment. DAMN. I hate to write about death. So serious, makes me wanna cry again. And I am, because it will happen anytime now.
Since then, I'm living my life in the moment. I can't change yesterday, but I can do something about it today. I'm uncertained about tomorrow, because I might not have the chance again. So, I'm living for today. What ever happens,
1. Forgive, forgiveness enlighten your soul.
2. You may not forget because things happen for you to learn, and do something about it.
3. Love, because love makes the world go round.
4. Be kind, and gentle, because it pays to be good.
When I recall again the dream, I was terrified again. Life is too short that I could lose everything that I have this moment. Just like that. One moment you are breathing. Another second, you might be having a heart attack. And within that split seconds, you recall the life you had. That near death moment. DAMN. I hate to write about death. So serious, makes me wanna cry again. And I am, because it will happen anytime now.
Since then, I'm living my life in the moment. I can't change yesterday, but I can do something about it today. I'm uncertained about tomorrow, because I might not have the chance again. So, I'm living for today. What ever happens,
1. Forgive, forgiveness enlighten your soul.
2. You may not forget because things happen for you to learn, and do something about it.
3. Love, because love makes the world go round.
4. Be kind, and gentle, because it pays to be good.
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